When Acceptance Means Surrender

MomI’m sitting in my gazebo, enjoying the quiet and the slightly cool breeze drifting through.  It’s one of those rare moments of solitude that I’ve gotten to enjoy this summer.  One where God is really speaking into my heart, into those areas that have been consumed by noise and busyness.

He is speaking to me about acceptance—of those things that I have come to realize I cannot change and have no control over.  We experience a lot of those as parents.  And the older our children get, the truer this is.

You see, in spite of my prayers…in spite of my training…my instruction…my guidance…my nurturing…everything isn’t necessarily falling neatly into place.  Some parts of parenting are just plain hard and have been for a time.  Some moments have been downright disappointing and at times frustrating.

Some of those things are unseen—only known to those who live within the walls of my home.  But thanks (or should I say no thanks) to social media, some are out there for all the world to see.

And then of course, some of those things are obvious to others because all they have to do is take a look—at the body language of a child and the outward attitude.

For so long I’ve been struggling about what others think.  How can I write a blog about parenting when it’s obviously not something I’ve perfected?  When everything seems to be so messy at times?

Well this is exactly what God is speaking to me about—coming to that place of acceptance that some things I just can’t do a thing about.  Now don’t get me wrong.  He isn’t telling me to take a defeatist’s attitude about it all.

I’m not supposed to give up.  I’m not to let go of hope.  And I am most certainly not being given permission to cease praying.

But He is asking me to trust to a level in which I can accept that things are what they are—for now.  They won’t always be this way.  Stages in a child’s life change, so I just have to wait.

He is also asking me to accept the views of others.  I can’t expect everyone to understand (or even care for that matter).  I can’t control other’s thoughts or opinions or judgments.  Instead, I just have to realize there are only a few people I can truly count on for support and intercession.

Trying to change things you can’t is futile.  It’s a waste of energy and time.  But I’ve been attempting to do that for so long, it’s probably going to be a challenge to stop.  And yet, God is assuring me—in this peaceful moment of time—that acceptance does not mean defeat.  What it ultimately means is surrender…true and complete surrender to Him and His plan for my children’s lives.

© 2012, Stephanie Romero

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5 thoughts on “When Acceptance Means Surrender

  1. You are speaking to the hearts of many Moms, and you are not alone in these thoughts. We expend so much devotion and energy to doing ‘right’ and feel terribly frustrated when “everything isn’t necessarily falling neatly into place”. Press forward in faith. I am praying for you this morning!

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    • I appreciate your response. These things aren’t always easy to write about…but they are real and they are life. I appreciate the prayers! Blessings!!!

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  2. We ask the wrong questions, “is it fair, is it a problem, could it be dangerous? ” The right question is ” Is it my job to do something about it right now?” If the answer is NO then I am not a bad person if I get a good night’s sleep. Peter was to be killed in the morning-nothing he could do about it. When the angel showed up he had to hit Peter to wake him up! Way to go Peter you got it right that time.

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